Athol Kay – The Married Mans Guide to Sex & Relationships Part 1

Mar 8, 2020 | Relationships, Visionary Men

 Athol Kay is an author, blogger, vlogger and coach on the topic of relationships, intimacy and sexuality to which he brings a vast educational and professional background including sociology, nursing and behavioural health.

He has written a number of books including his two most well known books The Married Man Sex Life Primer and The Mindful Attraction Plan.

Athol has also coached hundreds of men and couples in how to improve their relationships and is a highly regarded and experienced educator in relationship dynamics, how intimacy can be improved, and why men can truly become the best version of themselves to enjoy great relationships


“That’s when someone wants to get something from you and they kinda know they want to get something from you and they basically demand that you give them this thing without any sort of payment or reward to you…………..the easiest way to stop this is to say no”. 

– athol kay

athol and I discussed the following in this episode

  • How relationships are becoming overshadowed by the extreme drama and hype from social media.

  • Why things are often in a very bad way in relationships before a man will take action.

  • The knowledge that opposite sexes now have of each other but how ‘echo chambers’ can be a problem in how we form opinions of the opposite sex

  • The unconscious passing on of relationship knowledge from grandfathers to fathers and fathers to sons.

  • How trying harder can work against men, particularly if they are doing the wrong thing entirely.

  • The dynamic nature of relationships and how what works today won’t always work tomorrow.

  • Being the best version of yourself as opposed to mimicking or copying others, why this is so attractive to your spouse.

  • How being more Alpha, doesn’t always tick the box that your wife is into.

  • Two most attractive traits are having a high energy level and a good understanding of who you are, what you are doing and what you are about.

  • The importance of boundaries and why men can struggle with reasserting this.

  • How to practice establishing of boundaries.

  • The definition and application of Fitness Tests (Shit Tests) and how you can say no in order to re-balance your relationships.

  • How High Value and Low Value behaviour effect your levels of attraction.

  • Why one sided relationships can become very unbalanced (as in the case of Yellow Bear)


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